Who the F is my Authentic Self?

Uncategorized Apr 06, 2018



We live in a time where we no longer have to hit our 30s, have our children and get stuck with the decision of whether to continue in our less-than-fulfilling, not-quite-flexible-enough jobs, OR become a stay-at-home parent. We live in a time where we have so many more options now. We can create our own opportunities, some say, because we can access 'the world' with little more than a smartphone and an internet connection.


But because it is easier than ever before to start a personal brand based business, LOTS of people are doing it. There are minimal barriers to entry (or so it appears at first glance) and the marketplace is NOISY.


If you want to be heard over the noise, it's no longer enough to be better. It's no longer enough even to be different. You need to be able to genuinely connect with your audience. You need to know not only who you are and what it is that is that sets you apart, but how to communicate that online in a way that is meaningful to others.


I’ve found personally, and for the vast majority of people I speak to in my line of work, the first answers that pop into your mind when you consider “Who am I?” is a list of your life roles — mother, wife, [insert occupation here]…


Yet, what does that actually mean?


Our sense of identity is inextricably linked to our life roles, and to what we do. But if there are 50,000 other busy working parents who also do what you do, have similar skills to yours, and want to make a difference in the world, what is it that sets you apart?


It’s not silly to think about that question and hear nothing but crickets.


Who you are beyond what you do often sits in your subconscious.


Drawing it to the surface, having a good look at it, connecting with it and learning how to communicate it to others are tasks that I think are paramount to your success if you want to build a business that is driven by your purpose, and find joy in doing so!


So, let’s talk about what I think being authentic actually means. Because when I first started building my online business I got it in a bit of a muddle with being totally transparent (and even cringe-worthy oversharing) on my online platforms. My current ideas about being authentic were originally inspired by the amazing author and speaker, Todd Henry.


 In my opinion, when it comes to building your personal brand based business (that's a mouthful!) being authentic or being your authentic self, has THREE parts:

  1. Figuring out what matters. What work matters to you so much that you almost can’t help yourself but invest your time and energy into it? What is it that you do, that not only makes a difference to others but really lights a fire in your own belly?
  2. Showing up consistently and sharing your unique skills and perspective. This is the bridge between point 1 and point 3. If you’re to be inspired enough to consistently show up in relation to your body of work, it needs to be work that truely matters to you. 
  3. Connecting with others. This is essentially the most rewarding part of our work (and essential to business success in the service industry). We feel pain and frustration not so much when we are right or wrong, but when we have been unable to connect with someone. If we’re going to make a difference in the world, or to an individual, we cannot just bulldoze through with our own perspective under the guise of 'being authentic' with no consideration for how our words and behaviours affect others. 


Now, I live and breath this stuff. I love talking about human behaviour, feelings, emotions, motivation, values, meaning and purpose. But when I tried to launch my online business everything felt a bit awkward. A bit boring. Not quite me. I fumbled for ages before I realised I needed to come back to the foundation - who am I? How do I become a truer version of myself so I can achieve this deep fulfillment I'm looking for?

When I tried to dive deeper and figure this stuff out for myself I struggled to find the answers. Big time struggled. It felt like I had an inner knowing that I had something pretty amazing to share with the world, but I couldn't figure out how to package it in a way that would help me actually build a business around it.

It also felt like the more I tried to think about it, the more elusive the answer became.

I realised I had to come at it from a different angle. If I made the process fun and came at it from a relaxed brain perspective rather than looking directly at it, an enormous amount of clarity bubbled up.  My story connected to what I do and why. I felt connected to my personal brand and the value I offer people so deeply that the whole 'thing' of explaining to people who I am and what I do became second nature. It felt so right, and so true that I began to show up and offer my unique perspective more consistently and with more confidence, and my audience responded. The direction of my business that had felt *so close* and yet so freaking far away, seemed almost ridiculously obvious. A bit of a cruel joke, tbh.

I share this story so that those of you who feel like you keep coming up against a brick wall, might see that it's really as flimsy as a tissue. The struggle of 'figuring it out' is as powerful as it is frustrating.

 If you want to connect the dots for yourself and your business. If you want dive deeper (in a relaxed brain kind of way), I'm doing a workshop on the Gold Coast on Thursday May 3rd 2018. I'd love to see you there! I'll be sharing the infrastructure that I've put around figuring out who the F your authentic self even is, and how that matters to your audience and your business.

Learn more and buy tickets here. They are currently heavily discounted because I love to reward early adopters. The people who are brave enough to put their hand up and say 'This is for me.' The discount will be reducing regularly until tickets reach full price, so book now and save.   

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